Everyday should be a holiday!

Every year, we gather around a large dining table, maybe with family and a feast, maybe with just a few friends that have become family, or maybe with all of these things, minus a grateful heart. Thanksgiving was just a few weeks ago, and my favorite holiday, Christmas, is just around the corner. This is the time of year when being unhappy is difficult, but it wasn't until today that I realized that particular happiness of mine is somewhat superficial. After the holidays pass, I tend to get a little sad that they're gone; as odd as it sounds, it's almost like I forget what it's like to not have the "holiday mindset", if you know what I mean. Once all the ornaments on the tree get put away, and the Christmas tree makes its way from my living room to the street, I realize that so many other more important "things" similarly get put away or thrown out.

The happiness I associate with Christmas is only superficial because I've made it that way, though it shouldn't be. I don't always reflect on what it is that makes me smile a little longer at a stranger, or want to help someone who can't afford a Christmas gift for their kiddos. And on Thanksgiving, I love the food, I even love preparing it. I'm always happy on these two holidays (or pretty much any other) because of the memories I've collected throughout the years on those meaningful days. All of those memories are linked to spending time with my extended family, particularly during my childhood, when everything "seemed" perfect. So those memories obviously return to me, especially on Christmas morning. But what happens the rest of the year? Well, I do try...but you know, there's always an excuse that isn't really good enough.

In order to have sympathy or even empathy for someone, I think it requires a certain degree of thankfulness and a whole lot of understanding and patience. It seems that during the holidays, we temporarily allow our minds to be shielded from all the ugly thoughts they normally entertain. They don't have to be that gruesome, I'm simply referring to ungratefulness, judgmental attitudes, or an inability to forgive...it seems all these things get swept under the rug during the holidays (though not always). We temporarily ignore them, and that's okay but we should eventually deal with them. Maybe, for the sake of our own sanity, we easily embrace a pseudo-happiness that's so tempting because of its alleviating qualities, especially around the holidays. But, again, what happens the rest of the time? Maybe we stay a few zip codes away from our families, except for twice a year (on those special occasions), maybe we refuse to talk to certain people because we can only handle them in small doses, like medication. Maybe, on our bad days, we focus on everything that's going wrong, since there isn't a snowman vinyl cling on our window to put a temporary smile on our face. Does that sound familiar? Jeez, it sounds like me!

Yep, I confess. I feel guilty right now. I am happy, but I realize I need to be more like this throughout the year, not just when I get to go home to a house that smells like Christmas-scented oil or get to hear the same 20 Christmas songs played on the radio over and over again (and that doesn't bother me). I should also mention that most of the time I can't even stand it when they play the same songs over and over on the radio, or even play reruns on TV, but I do make an exception for Christmas songs and those cheesy little 30-minute claymation Christmas movies that I've always adored...strange, I know. Now why is it that my overall attitude can't take a lesson from my Christmas spirit?

I guess this is why they came up with the cliche that says something about keeping Christmas in your heart throughout the year. I also think this is why they say there is a difference between joy and happiness. Joy is when you're able to acknowledge that life is hard for everyone and still smile and behave lovingly anyway. Happiness is when you pretend that life isn't hard, and when you find out that it is, you turn into a year-around grinch. I'm a little bit of both, except maybe the latter doesn't completely apply, I do have my good days ;), I just want there to be more of them.

Being thankful throughout the year helps with a lot of things; it helps me realize that I have a lot more than most, whether it's the ability to handle difficulties or even that I have things like my health and a warm place to sleep. As a result, being thankful makes it so much easier to be a loving person, I'm a lot more understanding and less judgmental, because I realize that maybe some people don't have it as good as I do. Maybe they don't have any pleasant holiday childhood memories, maybe that's part of the reason why they don't think of anyone else but themselves? But instead of solely focusing on their selfishness, being grateful for what I have (like an ability to be happy instead of depressed around the holidays) helps me turn my focus to what THEY are lacking, and I'm not referring to the good attitude they aren't displaying but the love they've never received. Do you see what I mean?

So when we see a Salvation Army volunteer outside of a shopping center around the holidays, of course we should offer what we can to them, but we should also turn our focus to how we treat the poor throughout the year, and I'm not just referring to the financially needy. There are a lot of emotionally and spiritually poor folks on this Earth, and how we treat them partially determines how needy they remain. But, of course, maybe we need to reflect on what we are lacking first, and I'm not referring to material things, like the hippopotamus you may want for Christmas :) (I have been listening to way too many Christmas songs!).

It's almost Christmas!

Well...we still have quite a way to go, but it's close enough for me! I've been pretty busy lately, haven't had the time to blog...still, I've wanted to blog about so many things. Now that I actually have the time to sit and blog, I can't really remember what it is I've wanted to blog about...I guess I'm getting old, this is a sign, isn't it?

I know, that's completely not the case, but it does feel sometimes that life is just flying by and it definitely didn't seem that way when I was a lot younger, when I thought I'd never be old enough to stay up past 9pm (when I was sure all the magic began for everyone over age 8). Now it's about a quarter to 9, depending on whether or not you've changed your clock an hour back...and there appears to be no sign of magic brewing anywhere around here, but I think it's because I'm just getting used to the blissful feeling that comes with being blessed with way too many things to count. Lately it seems it doesn't matter if it's after 9 or not, life is still pretty wonderful, thank God for that.

That wasn't the case this time last year, when I was having a lot of issues with my gut; we weren't sure what was wrong, until the doctor finally figured out it was my gallbladder. As I reflect back on all of this past year's tough times, I can't help but have even more hope for things to come.

Ahh...I feel a blog entry coming on now:
Today, Jose and I took a walk around a really nice neighborhood here in Austin. There was a peaceful breeze, along with a ton of wonderfully autumn-colored leaves scattered on people's front yards, and it was quiet and calm. I didn't feel any physical pain, I could walk down the street without any worry that I might be in any kind of danger, and I knew that when we were done with our walk, I'd be able to go home. Home. That word has gained a new kind of meaning for me ever since Jose and I moved into our new apartment this past summer. It's literally a safe haven, something I've always wanted, and it's not just the cute vintage furniture and decorations that make it feel that way. This new home of mine is a place I've come to associate with the kind of peace I thought could only be experienced internally, in the humanly uninhabited places of our souls where only God resides when we've allowed ourselves to accept his love. But you know, literally speaking, this isn't even a home we're living in...it's an apartment, and here's where the analogy comes in: This is just one of the first big steps in life--moving into the first apartment--and yet it already feels like a home to me. I know this is a blessing because I think that not very many people at this age feel as if their lives are full; it's like they're waiting for something, but they don't know what they're waiting for, or what to do with themselves while they're waiting. There's usually so much uncertainty that usually leads to insecurity and overall unhappiness.

These days, for me, there's always something to come home to. Even if there isn't anything made for dinner yet, or the air conditioner is broken, among other things...I can know that at least I'm not emotionally starving and that I'm still in one piece, not broken at all, thanks to the one thing I can be certain of--the certainty of being loved. I hope everyone can go home for Christmas.

Cooking adventures, life's fun surprises, and giving thanks

I am so excited at how nice the weather has been lately; it's not exactly the typical fall weather we've been experiencing, but it's close enough for Texas! I love waking up early in the morning and opening all the windows of my lovely apartment; I can't believe I'm actually able to do this now. Oh how I've missed fresh air that's far from suffocatingly hot and disgustingly humid! I love how there's a carpet of crispy, colorful leaves leading up to the doorstep of my apartment! But most of all, I love how, right after Halloween, stores will start stocking up on Thanksgiving and Christmas decorations! I can't help it, I'm definitely a tiny bit happier during the Autumn and Winter months. You know what else excites me? The idea of being in a completely different section of the US this time next year! It's ridiculous how long I've wanted to live on the East Coast, and I'm thrilled that it's actually going to be a reality very, very soon!

I'm very thankful with how things have been going lately. Of course, life is never perfect, but I definitely feel like I can handle its little imperfections a lot better now than I could before. A big part of it has to do with the fact that I'm actually able to get out of the house a lot more. Sure, I definitely have my moments when I prefer to be indoors, but I notice that I'm a lot happier when I can interact with the world, at least for a couple of hours--and lets not forget my love for nature, trees, and sunshine; I even notice I feel better when I have the windows open, this is why I'm glad that it's actually been cool enough lately to be able to do that.

And the cooking adventures! There have been a lot of those...and in the future, there will probably be even more, especially since I'm actually cooking for a family now! It's like a little job of mine to be the personal "chef/cook" gal for this family I recently met through the school where I work on Tues/Thurs. I know it's just a tiny step, but I really do feel like this "culinary dream" of mine is coming to life a bit more as a result of this occurrence; it's like I can actually picture myself a caterer and restaurant owner. Even if I'm unable to attend culinary art school in the future, I don't see why those things still couldn't happen if they're already starting to, slowly but surely, become part of my reality...yes, very slowly...slow enough for me to really understand the science behind both cooking and baking...

Which reminds me, I've been planning on getting some books on cake/cookie decorating. You know, I always hear people say that "chefs don't bake" and that it's not possible to be a good baker and cook, but I don't buy it. I personally enjoy cooking and baking for different reasons. I do have to admit, most of the time when I bake, I'm so fixated on trying to make something quick enough to satisfy my impatient sweet tooth that I often overlook the aesthetic aspects of baking...you know, the decorating part. I focus more on trying to make it tasty rather than pretty, but I want that to change. I don't see why I have to sacrifice one for the other in that department either. Also, I feel like most of my food is "practical" in the sense that it's not new and creative, well, most of it isn't. The actual recipe might be creative in that it uses unique ingredients, but I would really love to incorporate flavors from different countries. I'd see this pursuit as something resembling painting--mixing different colors together, or flavors in this case, to get an amazing shade that'll effortlessly make the painted image pop out of its lifeless and confining canvas. I realize trying new foods will probably be the best way to do that, taste buds do make for a great palate, but we'll see how it happens...this should be interesting considering my demonic digestive system. Ah, so many obstacles to overcome, but this one is a cinch compared to all the other ones I've faced!

So if you see me around any time soon, I'll probably have an apron on. Ha. No, no. I'll probably just have a couple of oddly shaped fingernails. What? You ask. Yep, you read right. This is kind of grunny (aka funny and gross united to make a word I'm probably too embarrassed to use in real life but have enough guts to use in my blog because it won't be associated with my overly-dorky minnie mouse voice.): The other day I was cooking and noticed a piece of my nail was missing, it definitely looked as if a knife had severed it at an awkward angle...I have a feeling it ended up in our dinner...YUMMY! Hey McDonald's has their secret sauce, so I guess that makes us all entitled to our own little special ingredient, whatever it may be.

my world gets an occasional but very welcomed snowfall

Even though my glass looks cloudy on the outside (from the dirty fingeprints left by my hand that's usually been clutching the glass much too tightly in fear of dropping it), I always try to look at it half full instead of half empty. Of course, that's not always easy. But here's what came to mind this morning after finding out a little bit of good news that definitely brightened my day...

I've often thought about how it seems so many good people suffer the most, they get more than their share of burdens and heartache in life. It didn't seem fair to me, especially after seeing people I love go through more than just a few difficult situations. I wondered that if God really promised to protect his children, then why would he allow them to suffer so much, especially if they were leading meaningful and godly lives. In my younger years my grandmother would even tell me that we each had our own little guardian angel there by our side, and I loved that idea so much that I held onto it. To this day, I don't doubt that there are supernatural beings under God's authority protecting us, and I still believe that miracles happen on a daily basis. Even if they are as invisible to us as the face of God himself, they still impact our lives greatly, sometimes they are even the reasons why we are alive.

I've experienced my own miracles in life, and what's recently occurred to me is that I don't know if I could've experienced them in the same way had my life been easy from day one. But like every other human being, I do get tired of challenges; sometimes it seems like I want a life that's more like Candy Land instead of Trouble. Still, I also realize that it is easier for a couple of snowflakes to stand out among a murky field of dirt cakes than a blanketed field of flowers, if you catch my drift. If you're from Texas, and you've traveled to places where people actually have a white Christmas, then you know how much more excited Texans become when they're blessed with a day filled with an interesting mix of snow/sleet than those who take part in shoveling huge piles of snow on a daily basis (at least during the winter months, it isn't such a blessing to the latter group). But I guess when you're in a state, literally and figuratively, that usually resembles Hades, at least temperature-wise, then snow really is a blessing when the Cold Miser stops by for a brief visit.

So on days like this I celebrate. It's gonna be hot again, but my own little world got a tiny smidgen of snow today. It turns out one of the medical bills I thought I had to pay is actually going to be covered in-full by the billing department itself, since my insurance refused to pay what I initially thought they were going to; it's a complicated story, but here's the interesting thing... Even though for a while I had the extra burden of having to worry about another bill, if I never had that temporary disturbance, I wouldn't have been able to experience that slight tinge of happiness after discovering my balance on the bill would be brought down to $0. I would've just gone on with my life and missed out on a little blessing that originally started out as a burden. These are the things I need in my life to make me a thankful person.

You know, now that I think about it, I'm glad my life isn't like Candy Land. After awhile, I'd have a mouth empty of any teeth or full of cavities. I wouldn't appreciate life's sweet moments that seem to come along right after the more bitter ones. I'm glad my life is this way, it's like a dish I developed a taste for after realizing its complicated flavors actually do complement each other quite nicely while they enhance the overall eating experience. I always find a way to make food analogies, it seems :). But yeah, I don't like bland food so why would I want my life to be that way?

what makes life delicious

Food is beautiful. We need it to stay alive, but the wrong kind will eventually send us to an early grave. Though it seems the food that's the fastest, "most tasty" (at least in the opinion of the food-ignorant, food can actually be healthy AND good!), and most "filling" is also the nastiest--well, when you get down to basics. Junk food is like the cover of a mindless, trashy woman's magazine, it might look good on the outside, but there isn't much substance behind what's being presented. Basically, whether it's a figure that only looks flawless because it was altered by a computer, or a burger that only looks juicy because it's oozing with chemicals and flavor enhancers--the truth is, you're not getting the real deal, even if they love to see you smile or promise to let you have it your way.

Here's an interesting parallel:
It seems that modern day "love", or lust, is a lot like a drive-thru. People want instant satisfaction, whether or not it's good for them, and if they don't get what they want, they send it back without thinking twice, it's not like you had to wait that long anyway--no emotional attachments were made. Instant gratification is nice, no doubt, but what about the consequences? It seems our thoughts have become like a quick-stop, we dismiss them right after they've entered our minds because that's the only way we know how to keep the customer satisfied, Simon and Garfunkel style--in the sense that You're in trouble boy/and you're heading into more.

But you are your own customer getting yourself into trouble:
Your taste buds might be watering over some fabulous french fries drenched in oil, so why neglect the craving? And if you're also in need of a sugar fix, why not order up a side of eye candy to go along with it--something that just looks good, who cares about substance? Whatever looks and feels good, at least right now, seems to be the motto that eventually leaves us starved in every sense of the word. We poison our physical bodies with crap, no wonder it's so easy to feed our souls the same toxic chemicals. The sad thing is, what inspires that kind of behavior is the desire for happiness and satisfaction. If we could purchase the sense of happiness at a drive-thru we would, and we wouldn't care that it was only a "sense" and not the genuine article...or maybe we wouldn't know the difference, at least not until later.

At age 5, happiness was a brand new doll at Christmas from Santa, at least to me. Obviously my definition of happiness then was completely ignorant. The poor doll would eventually get buried in a box somewhere in my dusty garage after I found a new toy to replace it. Now, all the things I associate with happiness can't be disposed of. I can't even imagine growing tired of them because they are spiritual and emotional necessities. With time, I've not only come to appreciate meaningful relationships because they are rare and irreplaceable, but I've also come to value myself more as an individual. I don't like poisoning my mind or body with things that will distort my perception of happiness or life. Because I value life itself, I want to make it last, even if I have to make decisions that won't bring me instant gratification. This doesn't just go for serious issues, but also the lighter ones. Being able to give my all is so important to my happiness because it makes my life meaningful, and if I am in a destructive relationship, or I'm putting destructive food in my body, I'm not able to do that. I guess this is part of the reason why they say you have to love yourself before you can love anyone else.

One of my favorite movies is Como Agua Para Chocolate. There are a few reasons why I like it, but one of the more obvious ones is this: the way it entwines emotion and food. How the people experienced the food was directly related to the emotion felt by the person preparing the meal. Even though it was a fantasy-based movie, I do think some of its core elements can be applied to real life, at least in an indirect and symbolic way. For instance, we all know love really does make food taste better...and we are also too familiar with the saying: You are what you eat. So I guess if that's true, then most of us are greasy, fake, frozen at one point or another, and probably fried.

hungry but full

Life does funny things to you. Right when you think it's smooth sailing, that the rough winds have died down enough for you to not get sea sick...the waves start getting a little crazy again and you begin to wonder if the grotesque shade of green your face is turning matches the seaweed being heaved onto the deck of your recently polished boat. You know it's gonna be more than a three hour tour, far more than what you and Skipper bargained for.

So, this is how it is right now for me. It's been an incredibly rough week, but I'm determined to try to stay as "normal" as possible, continuing to busy myself with the things I love, especially cooking--even if I can't ingest the food I make. What irony, hu? The girl who wants to have her own restaurant one day, and possibly go to culinary art school, has pretty significant digestive problems that seem to be getting worse as of late (though I am thankful that up until this week, things seemed to be settling down....I guess it was just too boring for my body). It seems even cream of rice made with water and a pinch of sugar and cinnamon is too much for my disturbed stomach, it's quite pathetic and frustrating, considering how much I love food. It seems we actually have a love-hate relationship, but most of the time I tend to be in deep denial over the "hate" aspect of it.

Oh yes, I think my footprints are deeply embedded on the carpeted path leading from my bed to the lovely toilet room. And those fab all-night stomach stabbing-cramping sessions are back again, hopefully only for a short (but very unwelcomed) visit. I really do need this blog to vent, I don't want to mix what I love (i.e., cooking, poetry, and even music) with my not-so-happy bloggings, but, hey, I try to be realistic, I can't even stay unhappy for too long, it's "un-Sophie". I just wish I could divide things up that easily in real life...like, maybe I could convince my body to only get sick on days when it's too hot or even too rainy to do much else, and it would be quite wonderful if I could orchestrate my stomachaches around my work schedule, but life is holding the bulletin board of Sophie's activities, and my body is too darn weak to speak up and say NO, getting sick really is a waste of time, not to mention depressing, so lets focus on something more productive!

So even though there's still the medical bills to pay off from my past surgery, and college debt I can't forget about...at least I actually got my degree, and thank God I didn't have to sit around with a sick gallbladder, just waiting for my liver or pancreas to start malfunctioning. What else? At least I can still cook...and even if I can't eat it, I'm thankful it makes someone's day; Jose gets a kick out of trying something that came out of my at-home experiment lab, aka kitchen. And when I'm staring at the ceiling late at night, feeling like I'm the only one with gut-wrenching pain, I realize that I still have my entire life ahead of me. This isn't a fatal situation I'm in and God has already blessed me far more than I expected to be blessed at this point in my life. Who can forget this ultimate sustaining blessing--my sanity keeper--love. I have plenty of it, and even though my empty stomach might be craving a juicy steak which, upon its consumption, would definitely open the door for me to get a "thank you for being our #1 customer" call from a Charmin sales representative....I know my heart is full and quite satisfied.

So, yeah, I might feel like I'm the only 20 something year old with a 90 year old digestive system, but at least I know that what I have is meaningful and lasting. Sometimes I think I wouldn't have been able to figure it out on my own, all these obstacles have definitely opened my eyes. For instance, I don't know how many girls my age can say that their fiance has been there with them "in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, in good times and in bad."

It seems marital vows are quite easy to recite for anyone wearing the fanciest dress/tuxedo they'll probably ever own, but it appears those vows lose their significance once the "special" occasion is over; they get hidden in the closet and start to yellow like the once white wedding dress. The only gown Jose has ever seen me in is a hospital gown, and as far as I'm concerned, it actually holds more symbolic meaning and significance to me than any wedding dress ever could. And how do I know I'm with the right person and that I do have a groovy kind of love, even if Phil Collins already said he had it first? Because Jose's already done far more for me than what the average husband ever has to do for his wife, and, also, he's not doing it just because he vowed to, though it is evident that in his heart he's just as dedicated as if he did.

Another blog?! Yep!

Alright, being that I have an obsession with cooking AND blogging, I figured it'd be a good idea for me to open up a food blog. It's still pretty small, I just fixed it up a few days ago. I didn't want this blog's content to get too "messy" with just too much information... So to keep things a little more on the organized side, from now on I'll be posting all my "foodie stuff" on the food blog, while this site stays dedicated to just words/stories/random personal experiences--all that kinda stuff. Alrighty then, for now happy blogging (you know that's what I'll be doing)!

sneaky snickerdoodles: even kids will love this lowfat recipe!

So today I baked some snickerdoodles before heading off to work, where they were then sampled by some fabulous gals with very refined taste buds; they were all under age 10 :). Of course, I didn't tell them they were low-fat, at their age, that isn't really a concern, unless they don't have a gallbladder like me! Anyway, they loved them...they even asked for more but I didn't want these sneaky snickerdoodles to spoil their appetite for dinner. Jose was even surprised that these classic but wonderful cookies could be made with such a small amount of butter, he calculated that they each had less than 1g of fat! Then we decided that the Food Network really needs to have a show centered around cooking healthy food that still tastes just as good or even better than the unhealthier versions. I do love me some Food Network, but I do get a little disappointed at how so many of the cooks/chefs on there feel the need to use a tub of butter to cook their desserts! If I wanted butter that bad, I would just eat the stick by itself and not even put the time into baking...and why put all that butter in a dessert if it's just going to leave you with regrets afterward? I swear to you, next to the chocolate chip ones I posted earlier, these cookies are some of the best and DO NOT TASTE LOWFAT AT ALL. I'm sure you'll have to try them in order to really understand what I'm talking about, so here's the recipe. They're super easy to make, and I bet you even have these ingredients in your kitchen already!

2 dozen delectable snickerdoodles with less than 1g of fat per cookie:
Yes, even Martha will find it hard to believe.

1 1/2 Cups white sugar
1/2 TBSP cinnamon
2 TBSP nonfat milk
2 TBSP softened/partially melted butter
2 eggs
2 1/3 cups flour
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt

Cinnamon/Sugar Mix (guessing here--you decide what's good for you)
3 TBSP sugar
1 3/4 TBSP cinnamon

you know the unfancy drill of throwing it all into a bowl...then just roll up little 1 in. balls of dough and dip them into a cinnamon/sugar mix--place them on a cookie sheet and slightly flatten them out with a teaspoon and bake them at 400 for 10-11 minutes (they don't expand much, so you really just need about 3/4 of an in. between each cookie).

If anyone out there uses this recipe, tell me how you liked the cookies!

Goodbye, Bisquick!

I always wondered what, exactly, made up the Bisquick mix contents. The ingredients list was long and complicated, and I knew it couldn't possibly be THAT complex to make pancake mix...so I took the plunge and made up my own. Now, though I often downplay butter's greatness, I do think it's a great idea to use the stuff when making pancakes, either in the actual pancake mix or as a pancake topper. Speaking of pancake toppers, I made an apple topper. I love apples in baked goods, so I tried making the mix a little spicy and apple flavored, but I also wanted apples on top...so here's what I did to make these...


Apple Cinnamon Spice Pancakes
(this recipe makes about 8 medium-sized pancakes)
1 1/2 Cups flour
1/2 TSP baking soda
1/2 TSP salt
2 TBSP sugar
1 TBSP cinnamon
1 TBSP canola oil OR BUTTER, butter is better in this case!
1 Cup milk
1 egg
1 TSP apple pie spice

Mix all this stuff in a bowl, as usual. The mix might be a bit too light for some, but I like thin pancakes. If you want them heartier/thicker, just add 1/4 cup more flour. Cook the pancakes on a low setting, they burn easily! Also, when they're done cooking and still warm, add a tiny teaspoon to the top and let it melt for a better buttery taste. Oh yeah, I also love powdered sugar on pancakes, as if they aren't already sweet enough!

And this is what made up that...


Apple Topping
1 whole apple-- sliced (I used pink ladies because their tartness balances out the sweetness of the rest of the ingredients, but you can use fuji if you want something sweeter)
1 TBSP brown sugar
1/2 TBSP butter
2 TBSP apple sauce
1/3 cup apple juice

To cook the topping, bring all these ingredients to a boil in a sauce pan, then put on a medium setting for about 10 minutes, or until the apples are cooked to your liking--I cooked mine until they were soft. You might also want to add 1 TBSP more of water, if your sauce is thicker than you want it to be.

That's it, folks. Not only will these pancakes give your taste buds a nice morning wake-up call, their sauce will fill your house with a Christmasy-cinnamon smell, like naturally seasonal potpourri :).

THE best chocolate chip cookies & they're LOWFAT!

I've made so many chocolate chip cookies, always hoping that the next batch will come out just right. How do I like chocolate chip cookies? With just the right amount of chocolate chips, crispy edges and a chewy/soft center that doesn't taste raw! I found a pretty good recipe, but it was wayyy too buttery. I literally had butter/grease all over my fingers after munching on a few, so I knew I had to do something...and I did. I reduced the amount of butter by over 1/3 of a cup! I also added a bit more flour, a tiny bit of water to add that crunch, a little more brown sugar, along with a little less chocolate chips...oh yeah, and baking powder instead of soda.

Deceivingly Low-Fat Chocolate Chip Cookies
(I swear, they actually taste better without the extra butter!)

1 1/3 cup flour
3/4 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup white sugar
1 egg
1 TSP vanilla extract
1/2 TSP baking powder
1/2 TSP salt
2 TSP hot water
2 1/2 TBSP butter
1/3 cup chocolate chips

Mix all the ingredients together in a medium-sized bowl; if you use about 1 TBSP worth of cookie dough for each cookie, then bake them for about 11 minutes on 375, you'll get a good-sized baker's dozen...and happy taste buds!

I couldn't help myself, I'm learnin' so much

Catholic Quiz: What Kind of Catholic Are You?

You scored 59, on a scale of 0 to 100. Here's how to interpret your score:
0 - 25		You are a Centering Prayer (very progressive) Catholic.
26 - 50		You are an Ignatian Exercises (moderately progressive) Catholic.
51 - 75		You are a Divine Office (moderately traditional) Catholic.
76 - 100		You are a Daily Rosary (very traditional) Catholic.

Well, I couldn't help myself...one of my new jobs, as one of a few editors working for one of UTs professors, requires me to do a lot of research regarding religion; particularly the monotheistic ones, and I've been learning so much lately that I've become curious about my own claimed religion. I was raised Catholic, but my mother eventually swayed the Protestant way, and though I agree with some protestant beliefs, I've come to realize that I'm a little too progressive. I wouldn't necessarily call myself a traditionalist Catholic. In fact, I've never even prayed the rosary, nor do I feel that it's a necessary act. I think I know where Bono stands, and I pretty much agree with his beliefs. haha, sorry, that guy...he is my male version of Mother Teresa.

Anyway, thanks to a class I took on the reformation my last year of college, I learned a little about the good stuff that went down during the Second Vatican meetings, and how there were a few conservative Catholics who had their feathers ruffled because some of the newly introduced ideas seemed to stray too far from the familiar. I think it needed to happen, though, for many reasons. I can only name a few off the top of my head, and I don't want to go into too much detail (considering I had to do it for 4 hours straight earlier today--I'm working on a paper with the professor, he's lecturing at an interreligious dialogue conference, which should definitely be interesting). I've actually been a bit surprised by some of the stuff I've learned, like how one of the Vat II documents literally states that Muslims (okay, I'm getting out my notes, I want to make sure I quote this properly)......ok, what does it say Sophie? Umm...here it is. "...at the Second Vatican Council, the Catholic Church proclaimed its respect and esteem for Muslims and asserted that Islam was a genuine path of salvation." Wow, what a claim to make! Especially after declaring for so long that the Catholic Church was the one true church! That quote was taken from "Turkish Experience of Muslim Christian Dialogue: Past and Present" in case you want to read more about it; it's actually a really, really well-written, far from boring paper that does a good job of summing up the efforts made by some Christian, Jewish, and Muslim leaders who are trying to peacefully "find common ground," if you want to call it that.

I think I know why the quiz resulted in giving me a "moderately traditional" title, I am pretty conservative when it comes to abortion. Yeah, I pretty much hate it, to say the least. But I'm not at all for damning the people who've had them; actually, I'm not holy enough to point the finger, it's not like my name is God. Now that I remember, it would really bother me when the extremists would come around campus; I hated their dumb billboards. I couldn't even look at them they were so horribly gruesome, I can't even imagine how they would make someone feel who actually had an abortion. That is the wrong way to go about getting a message across, it even makes me cringe at the thought of calling them pro-lifers, it's more like pro-condemners! I personally feel abortion is detrimental to the person who receives it, and the "fetus" that dies, but I think those billboards are right up there too! I wish they'd invest their money in something more productive, like raising money for the expecting women who would make it a full-term pregnancy if their only reason for not taking that route was a monetary one...or educating girls on how to avoid getting themselves into that kind of a situation. I don't know why people just leave it up to the state. Sure, health is great, but kids do skip class...and while they're skipping they're probably doing the very thing they wouldn't be doing if some 'informative knowledge' was planted in their brain ahead of time. I know, I know it's not that simple...just here me out. Just so you understand, at 14, I was already helping my mom raise money for our city's crisis pregnancy center, so you know how passionate I am about this issue...that's why I went off on a tangent! They got me at a young age :)!

Anyway, religion! I think that's another issue we shouldn't be ignorant about, if just for the sake of our fellow man, most of the world follows one faith or another. How do you know what to believe or not believe if you don't know what there is to believe or not believe???? Hmmm...

Farmers Market Fun

Jose and I went to the Sunset Valley Farmers Market today, it was sooo hot outside though! It was fun going to see what all the local farmers/business folk were selling, even if some things were a little on the pricy side, like Jose's $3.00 chai tea...but we did pick up some worthwhile items that will definitely serve as lively ingredients in a few of this week's dinners. There were so many different herbs to choose from; I decided to buy a little bit of basil, sage, and oregano. I also came across a farmer who was selling these tiny garlics with a very powerful, almost sweet scent. In spite of their little size, their smell was a lot more potent than that of the much larger garlic cloves I normally buy at the grocery store. I can't wait to use them, even the herbs. I notice a significant difference in taste when using fresh as opposed to dry herbs, and I hope to eventually start my own herb garden, but that probably won't be for awhile. For now, I'm happy with the occasional visit to the farmers market, and here are a few pictures from this weekend's herb-buying-and-spotted-pig-spotting adventure :


These are some of the things I bought. I love the fresh flowers in a can idea, it's cheap and a cute paradox. Oh yeah, that may look like a munchkin bell pepper, but, apparently, it's a cross between a chili and red bell...I think jalapeño? Can't remember. And those are the mini garlics with a loud bark (click on the pic for a better look).


I love these flowers:


my new spotted friend without fur, the spots are my fav:

Let them eat cake!

Last year for Jose's birthday, I made him a cake from a recipe I found on Allrecipes.com. It's called "Crazy Chocolate Cake"; I was surprised he loved it, considering I didn't have much time to work on it, it called for absolutely NO butter, milk, or even eggs...I thought it was a weird recipe, but was grateful that he liked it, no less. I wasn't too happy with it, so of course I tweaked the chocolate cake recipe; I was happier with it after a few alterations...then I discovered that the "base" of the recipe made for a great cake, you just have to change a few of the ingredients depending on the kind of cake you want to make. I made a chocolate chip cookie cake using the main components of the chocolate cake recipe, including my changes...it came out with an interesting taste, considering I added a lot of the ingredients that are usually added to the standard chocolate chip cookie recipe. Again, Jose likes it, and I actually like it too; adding those extra dairy products really does make a big difference in both the texture and taste of the cake. So here's the recipe...too bad the picture doesn't look as yummy as the cake really tastes, but that's why I'm not on the road to being a professional photographer, I just don't have the knack for it; I'll stick to cooking, baking, and writing, thank you very much!

Chocolate Chip Cookie Cake
3 Cups Cake Flour
2 Cup White Sugar
1/2 Cup Brown Sugar
1 Tsp Salt
2 Tsp Baking Soda
1 Tsp Vanilla Extract
1 Cup Nonfat Milk
2 eggs + 1 egg white
2/3 Cup Canola Oil
1/3 Cup Crushed Walnuts
1/2 Cup Chocolate Chips

Topping:
1 Graham Cracker (crushed)

Basically, mix the dry ingredients in one bowl, the wet ones in another, and then mix them together, including the crushed walnuts and chocolate chips. After baking in a 350 degree oven for about 25-30 minutes in 2 round baking pans, then letting it stand to cool-off for about 15 minutes, the cake should be ready to frost! I made a really cool frosting (it's actually on the cake) but I did not bother measuring the ingredients. All I know is that I used about 1/4 of the amount of butter than was called for...guess what I used in its place???? Plain flavored organic rice milk! It was pretty unbelievable how much healthier it came out (since most frostings call for a ton of shortening and/or butter) but we literally couldn't taste the difference! I will forever use plain rice milk in place of an entire stick of butter whenever I make frosting! Oh, almost forgot, sprinkle the crushed graham cracker on top of the frosted cake, then place a few chocolate chips on top; it'll really look like a chocolate chip cookie cake if you do !

My worst hospital experience. EVER!

Jose sent a few others and me an article that talks about the key issues to keep in mind when deciding whether or not to fire your doctor. Thankfully, I haven't had too many bad doctor experiences. Though there have been those few doctors that seemed to not really care about what I had to say...I've only once had a really bad experience at a hospital. I won't mention the name, but I will say it was located in South Austin; if you're from around here, you probably know the place I'm referring to.

Anyway, I went there twice this year. The first time wasn't actually bad at all; it was the time I was sent to ER by a general practitioner who thought I had pancreatitis, right before I had my gallbladder removed. Anyway, that visit, like I said, went really well--other than the fact I was sick. It could be that the people who work during the day are a lot more knowledgeable and respectable than those who work during the late night hours? Who knows. The second time around wasn't so pleasant, it was the night following my gallbladder removal. I went to ER because I had the worst stomach pain in the world, it was literally so bad that two shots of demerol still didn't cut it (it has morphine-like pain killing properties)--in fact, it just made the agony of it all so much worse because I had an allergic reaction to the medication, so I was ridiculously itchy; I felt like I was going to scratch my face off.

Anyway, the first unpleasant experience came when the nurse was injecting me with demerol the first time around that night. Jose was right next to me and he told him (the nurse) that when I had a similar, strong pain medicine before, the nurse injected me slowly because it gave me a huge migraine type headache the first time. Well, this nurse said it wouldn't make a difference if he did it fast or slow (but the nurse before said it did)...hell yeah it did, I could feel it! In fact, that's why the nurse from the prior time injected me with the medication slow, because the first time she did it, I was writhing in pain, I thought my head was going to explode. Well, during this hospital visit, the jerk of a nurse did it fast, even Jose got upset because he was actually the one to tell the nurse to do it slow; Jose knew I was in pain because of how hard I was squeezing his hand. Tears seriously came to my eyes; don't ever have them inject you with a quick, huge dose of demerol, it leaves you feeling pretty disgusting in the process! Needless to say, this nurse actually did do it slower the second time he injected me--but even though I told him I couldn't stop itching from the first injection, he went ahead and gave me another hit. AND guess what? I later discovered that I was actually having an allergic reaction to the medication (aka the itching)! What a nut.

That's not the worst part about it. They had to do a CAT scan of my digestive system, to make sure my liver wasn't damaged, because sometimes that can cause the kind of pain I was experiencing. So, after not being able to eat after the surgery, and this was the doctor's orders, a nurse said I needed to drink a pint of this contrast solution that would make my innards pretty much "light up" for the CAT scan. I did it, though it did take me awhile, considering I felt like my insides were having problems even when they were empty. Still, while I was slowly drinking this solution, the nurse came in and told me I needed to hurry up, otherwise it would wear off. I told her OK, then I asked how much time I would have to finish it but SHE DIDN'T TELL ME! Next thing I knew, another horrible medical assistant with a lovely ghetto attitude came in with an evil grin plastered on a face and a tube in hand, then she said she was going to insert that tube down my nose if I didn't finish the remaining drink right then and there! She then walked closer to me as if she was preparing to do it (and she was because she actually brought someone else in to help her assemble that ugly tube machine!). I merely responded by saying she was being rude and her behavior was inappropriate. I wasn't unpleasant in my response, but I told her that the fact that she literally had the tube in her hand and said, word for word, "I'm going to stick this tube down your nose," without any warning and with the intent of scaring me, was completely wrong. Oh, and here's the best part, right after I told her that she shouldn't be trying to scare me into doing it (and that I would've appreciated it if they actually told me how long I had before I needed to be done with the solution!) I heard her gossiping outside my room...ABOUT ME! She was laughing with another nurse and then she said "she knows what she's getting, I just told her"! As if I'm some prisoner of theirs in a torture chamber instead of a sick patient recovering from surgery in an emergency room! Seriously, I was baffled, and I wasn't exaggerating because even Jose was disturbed by her far from professional behavior.

Of course, we confronted the doctor about the situation; thank God he wasn't that bad, but the nurses and medical staff that night were absolutely horrible. I think I left that night feeling more sick than when I arrived. Don't ever let this happen to you; avoid this place, and similar places with yucky hospital staff, like the plague!

My little house

Hewo!
Here is a little picture of my little living room filled with little things that Jose and I collected from here and there, all bargains, of course. I will post a more exciting entry soon! (By the way, I posted this picture here on the side of the little afro whatever-it-is because it reminds me of Jose...when he's in dire need of a haircut and a good frizz control serum, I thought it was cute!)

Long time no type!

Hello World!
Sorry it seems as though I've temporarily fallen off the face of the earth. Life has been keeping both Jose and I very busy! Of course, I'm still cooking, nothing will stop me from making new dishes! Not even my own funky digestive system.

Anyhow, in just a few short days we will be moving into our new apartment! I am so excited, it'll be our first "home"! It's likely we've purchased almost every possible cute decorative objective from the thrift stores here in Austin. I've never done so much thrift shopping in my life and I think I'm an addict! Sometimes I'm amazed at what cute objects people throw away. Just last weekend I purchased this really sweet Pillsbury Dough Boy sugar/creamer set...and, no, I don't drink coffee, but I've always wanted Pillsbury Dough Boy paraphernalia, even if I refuse to buy his pre-made cookie dough. (I was a big fan of that stuff as a kid, now I have a pride issue about buying even canned beans or practically-already-made cookies/cakes--one day I will make everything from scratch, I'm determined!)

In just a few weeks, Jose and I will hopefully be working part-time, and in just a little over a month he'll be starting his final year of college...then it's time for the great move to wherever Jose wants to go to law school! Sometimes I think I'm more excited than he is, though I'm sure he's looking forward to it, but I'm coming down with that former military brat syndrome. What are the symptoms? Well, for me--I feel awkward staying in one city for too long. Don't get me wrong, I've always wanted to settle down and feel like I actually have a real home (instead of feeling the way I did during the "moving years," as if I lived in a storage facility loaded with the many boxes I refused to empty, since I'd have to start packing right after unpacking the last box, anyway).

But it's not exactly time to officially settle down yet, if you know what I mean. Even when Jose's in law school, we'll still be going back and forth, probably during the summer months, between Texas and Connecticut...or New York...or Virginia...or California (depending on where he decides to go). So it seems I've adopted a few ways of the gypsy, but once that biological clock starts ticking, and I start buying onesies, bibs, and bonnets with my college insignia embroidered on them in tiny pink or blue letters, I plan on settling down, most likely here in Texas with my far from cowboy, not quite city slicker, but wonderfully dorky hunk of a hubby, wow...what a long title I've given him, and what a run-on sentence that was!

In much fewer words, I'll sum up my blog absence excuse like this: Life is good, lots of sunny days...but we're still in Texas, literally and figuratively, so the weather changes in the blink of an eye. No complaints here, though, at least we have an umbrella of blessings to keep us dry when it pours; it helps us last through the unexpected storms, if you will. Speaking of the weather, now in a more literal sense, the lightening and thunder outside are pretty intense right now...I will definitely miss these Texas storms when I leave. But I am looking forward to seeing the first snowfall of another state's winter season, and mostly...living life the way it was meant to be lived under any conditions: loaded with love, full of thanks, and stuffed with meaningful moments, like the after-effects that develop from sharing a near perfect Christmas dinner with the people who've inspired us to live that way long after we've broken all our other New Year's resolutions.

I'm grateful that I can finally see I have so many things to be grateful for.

Recipe: Meatball Soup

This recipe was taken from my grandma's version of meatball soup. I improvised, mainly because I seriously don't remember what, exactly, went into the actual "soup" part. I've made this multiple times, and to be honest, I usually tend to overcook the little pastas and zucchinis. That didn't happen this last time, though!

I usually purchase ground meat (turkey in my case) 1lb at a time, but when I use it to make something other than meatloaf or hamburgers, I find that 1lb tends to be too much meat when it comes to dishes that call for more than just a slab of ground meat (things like meatball soup). So that's why I actually used the same meat from the previous recipe (I seasoned it the same way, so refer to yesterday's entry for the meat when preparing the meatballs). I cooked both dishes on the same day. My initial plan was to just make the meatball soup, then I realized I wanted to make something new with the "leftover" meat, hence the chilaquiles recipe I posted yesterday.

Anyway, here's what I added to the meatball soup this time around, usually I change up the recipe each time I make it. It's nothing major, really, just different veggies depending on what's in the fridge (my grandma adds spinach and I was going to until I realized the only spinach we had was canned, and that stuff is gross, in case you haven't figured it out for yourself!)

Meatball Soup (this makes enough for about 4-5 hearty servings)

Meatballs: (see previous entry for the "meat" recipe, but this time, roll the meat into 1/2-1 in. meatballs)

The soup (these ingredients will be added to a large pot that should be able to hold more than 1qt):
3/4 of the 32 oz Pacific Natural Foods beef broth quart (the rest can be used to make gravy...)
1 cup water
1.5 TBSP salt-free garlic and herb seasoning
1/2 TBSP Italian seasoning
2 tsp salt (I'm guessing here, basically, whatever amount tastes good to you)
2 fresh bay leaves
1 tsp black pepper
1/2-3/4 of 1 large green bell pepper, finely chopped
1/4 bag of baby carrots, cut long-ways or 2 large carrots, diced
1 large zucchini or 2 medium, also diced
1 large corn on the cob, remove kernels with knife and add to soup pot
1.5 oz sliced black olives
1 can stewed tomatoes*
1/3 of a 16oz bag of garden rotini pasta
*the stewed tomatoes add a lot of acid; the soup can be made without it and it'll still taste good, tomato just adds another dimension of flavor. If you do want to go ahead and add it, you can add a little baking soda to lessen the acidity.

Instructions:
Bring beef broth and water to a boil once the spices and stewed tomatoes are added. Next, lower the flame to a medium setting and add the meatballs until they are no longer pink. Once the meatballs are cooked, add the carrots...once they are tender, add corn. Lower the flame even more, to a "low/simmer" setting, then add the zucchini. Cook the zucchini for only about 5-7 minutes, then add the pasta and olives. The pasta is the last thing to cook, turn off the flame when the pasta is less than al dente; the heat from the soup will continue to cook the pasta until it's just right. Once the pasta is cooked (again, while the flame is off!), the soup can be served, since it will be cool enough to eat at this point.

Recipe: Quick and Easy Chilaquiles

So here's my first recipe posting...and it's for a Mexican dish! It's not authentic, although Jose claims that it tastes like it is, so I'm gonna take his word for it. Why isn't it authentic? Because I used so many canned items and...premade tortillas! I am ashamed, I truly am, considering I am half Mexican and grew up with a grandma who makes the best Mexican food this side of the border. I usually hate using canned goods, but when I'm too lazy to make the food myself, I purchase it premade. I know how to cook beans, at least, but today, I was too lazy to do even that! It's ok, though, considering I'm still entitled to the "college student" label, and we all know what most college kid's diets consist of: Ramen and Ramen, and maybe white rice or some kind of freezer burned pizza! I like experimenting outside of those three food groups, but like I said, sometimes it's nice to just keep it simple...we all have days like that.

So here it is, it's my quick version of chilaquiles. If you're not familiar with this simple but still pretty good Mexican concoction, it's a mix of meat, chili, cheese, and tortillas (or corn tortilla chips, but I used soft flour tortillas, instead). I changed up the recipe even more by adding black beans, they're full of iron and fiber! yum yum! I also mixed in some ground meat (oh, and I use ground turkey instead of ground beef because it's a lot healthier). The cheese I used was very American: Colby jack...but I don't have any goats around here, and I'm not as fabulous as my grandma, who can make her own cheese! So, Kraft, thank you for saving this culturally ignorant child by coming to her rescue on a lazy day like this!

This recipe makes about 4 servings of chilaquiles

Here are the ingredients:
For the meat:
1 TBSP garlic and herb bread crumbs
1/2 lb ground turkey
2 tsp fine herb spice (I bought this at Central Market*)
1/2 Tbsp garlic salt
1 tsp pepper
1 TBSP olive oil

*Central Market is basically a gourmet grocery store here in TX, I know they don't have them over in CA, but Whole Foods probably carries this mix of spices too.

The other stuff:
1/2 15 oz can organic black beans
1/4 bag low fat Kraft colby/jack cheese
1/2 tsp crushed red pepper
1/2 container mushrooms
2.25 oz can of sliced black olives
1 10 oz can Old El Paso green chile sauce (mild, if you can't take the heat like me!)
2 tsp Tabasco sauce
5 flour tortillas (cut these up into little bite-size squares)

Garnish:
1 tbsp sour cream/serving
1tsp pace picante sauce/serving
1 small handful colby/jack cheese/serving


Instructions:
Mix the meat and all the meat ingredients into one medium sized bowl (except the olive oil), after all the ingredients are thoroughly mixed in the meat, cook the meat over a medium-low flame/setting in a pan with the olive oil until the meat is no longer pink. Then, slowly add in "the other stuff". First the mushrooms, mix them in with the cooked meat so they absorb the flavor of the spices, then add in the black olives along with the olive juices from the olive can. Then add in the red pepper and Tabasco sauce, mix in with meat/olives/mushrooms. Finally, add the green chili sauce, followed by the flour tortillas, then sprinkle the cheese on top. Lower the flame so it's on the lowest setting, and cover the pan until the cheese melts and the tortillas are soft. Then serve and eat as is or with the garnishes. See, it's pretty darn simple and it only takes about 30 minutes to cook/prepare and less than 2 minutes to eat!

9 Months of fun

I enjoy reading-up on Health stuff, sometimes it's because it applies to me, and other time it's because...well, it's just interesting. I watch the History and Discovery channel for fun, you can call me a dork or just plain boring, and I won't argue with the first claim but I can't agree with that last one. Boring people do boring things...but I actually have fun when I dedicate an evening to watching a National Geographic special about babies and their development in the womb. I am also content with the fact that I have someone in my life who'll happily join me on these dorky cable TV adventures, and that person is Jose.

But there is something extra special about fetal development and all that goes on in the womb before the big eyes belonging to that cute little pudgy baby open up to get their first glimpse of an even bigger world. It'll be a long time before I know what it's like to hold my own delicious dough-like ball of cuteness, but I remember how cute and soft my brother was when he was still a baby.

They look pretty simple, actually: not much hair, tiny fingers and toes, toothless and tender, but these newborns are the finished products of a very long and complicated 9 month process. It's pretty amazing what goes on, at first all the mother can feel is usually that overwhelming pang of nausea brought about by morning sickness, then that wears off and the generally uncomfortable feeling develops and lingers long after the cravings kick-in. I remember what it was like...not entirely, though, never been there done that...not yet, remember! Got ya! I guess I should stop talking as if I actually know what I'm talking about, hu? But watching my mother, helping her out, noticing the changes in her behavior and appetite, it was something. Little did I know that there were so many complicated chemical reactions occurring and they were responsible for the changes. Oh yeah, and I'll never forget her odd cravings (actually, she went through a late-night cooking/eating phase...it was alright when she was obsessed with eating calamari and baking lemon cakes, but then she decided to make a gag-inducing banana meatloaf and it was all downhill from there! She actually got the recipe from a friend who wasn't even the least bit pregnant!).

Anyway, doctors emphasize the importance of taking pre-natal vitamins in order to ensure that the fetus has the proper nutrients it needs to develop, but you don't usually hear too many people talk about the negative implications of stress...at least on the fetus during pregnancy. Sure, it's been suggested that ulcers can develop as a result of stress, and that someone's life can be shortened as a result of spending too many sleepless nights worrying, but not until recently have the effects of stress on fetal development been depicted as serious issues by various people in the medical profession, from behavioral psychologists to perinatologists (oh, and I didn't even know what that was until I read this fancy article on medicinenet.com). Oh yeah, and National Geographic had a few things to say about it too, that's where I first heard about it: Mom gets stressed too often, baby develops in ways that'll help him adapt to that stress later on in life, then that increases his chance of developing diabetes, a learning disorder, or even anxiety issues in his own life.

Stress is inevitable but some of it is also avoidable. Of course, we all get stressed out about things we can't control, like getting sick during finals or getting rear-ended as a result of someone else driving too fast during unsafe, rainy conditions, but it's the things we can control that can actually cause us more long-term stress than the things we can't. We can control who we decide to marry and when we decide to have children; we choose what we put in our bodies, and I'm not just referring to drugs (legal and illegal) what we watch and read influences our habits, how we behave and think, in different but just as important ways. By the way, fetal development is very much affected by the father, not only the mom, so it's just as important for him to stay healthy and avoid ingesting anything toxic or harmful, like tobacco or alcohol, when he and his wife are planning on having kids. Even if you're in college, um...smoking pot more than the ever-so-popular "couple of times" now will destroy your sperm count, keep this in mind when/if you wanna have kids in the future. I'm sure you learned that in high school health, but it's likely that killing off all those brain cells has impaired your memory, among other things, and you forgot. Sarcasm aside, I am allowed to say this because my dad was a big time pothead in another time and I'm sure I would've been a lot smarter/healthier if he wasn't, and I'm sure he would've been too.

I've heard it said, and I agree: If people need a license to drive, they should have to get one before they become parents. I know, I've mentioned this to Jose and he's said what I'm sure you're thinking, this gets in the way of people's freedom, something with that ring to it. Then I have to ask myself ...Well, should people really be held completely responsible for making stupid decisions? When does nurture override nature? I guess this is where having a sense of morality comes in, you know, convictions. Some things are right, some things are definitely wrong and never gray, and I think hurting your child, or even fetus (to be politically correct), is always wrong. Even if stress seems unavoidable, there are ways of managing it.

Baking Secrets: Butter isn't always better

Ok, so I'm addicted to sweets, and baking/cooking, so I figured I should devote at least a little section of my blog to my many experiments in the kitchen. I don't have any pictures of this last experiment, because I already gobbled up the cake I made where I actually applied these techniques I'll be sharing. I do promise to take a quick pic of whatever I make in the future before I decide to stuff my face.

Anyhow, it seems that wherever I look, people are posting recipes that definitely look delicious and taste-bud pleasing, but they're also heart attack inducing and tummy ache producing, at least for me. After having my gallbladder removed, I have to stick to a somewhat low fat diet. This has required me to alter the way I bake. So below are a few low fat tips that actually work and don't leave your tummy, heart, or taste buds unhappy.
A few tips on baking low fat cookies:
I'm not really a fan of using apple sauce instead of butter (this only applies to cookies, don't use apple sauce in cakes unless the recipe calls for it) but I have found a way of making cookies that are less fatty, just as good, and sometimes even better than the original recipe. If you want to go the apple sauce route -- let's say the recipe for a batch of chocolate chip cookies calls for about a cup of butter, as most of them do -- add a HALF CUP apple sauce instead, if you use a full cup of apple sauce, they'll come out much too soft and chewy without much crunch. If you're a fan of Paula Dean, and you love that stick of butter, then go ahead and use it, but just cut the required amount in half; the cookies will be crunchier and less soft. If you want them soft without the butter fat, then use an extra egg yolk (don't include the egg white. And yes, I know egg yolks are still fatty, but at least they have more protein, silly!).

How to make moist cakes without all that butta :
It's quite the opposite with cakes, though, at least on that last note. You actually want to use less egg yolks and mostly egg whites if you want a cake that's light and fluffy. About a week ago, I made a cake that called for 3 whole eggs and one half cup of butter. I changed the recipe up by adding 1 whole egg and the egg whites of the remaining 2 eggs; I also replaced the butter with Canola oil (this is another fat-cutting technique) and added 2 TBS light sour cream (to make it extra moist without calling on Duncan Hines for help). When I followed the recipe exactly the first time around, the cake was pretty good, but it was surprisingly much better the second time around...and it was less fatty. Just because something claims to be low fat doesn't mean it has to taste low quality.

So here's the recipe for a yellow cake:
(You'll use 2 round 9" pans for this recipe; fill each one about one-third the way. Pre-heat oven to 350 and cook for 25 minutes; and if you're not lazy like me, go ahead and mix the wet ingredients in one bowl and the dry in another, then mix both together in a big bowl...but if you're more like me, just throw it all together and mix the ingredients enough to get rid of the lumps, but not too much because it'll mess up the baking process--it has something to do with the baking powder and how it reacts with the remaining ingredients, I read about it on a cooking chemistry site but I don't remember the details, just this little tidbit, ha!)

The original:
2 cups cake flour
2 TSP baking powder
1/2 TSP salt
1/2 Cup butter
1 Cup sugar
3 large eggs
2 TSP vanilla extract
3/4 Cup milk

My low-fat version:
2 Cups cake flour
2 TSP baking powder
1/2 TSP salt
1/2 Cup Canola oil
1 1/4 cup sugar (it needs a little more)
1 whole egg
2 egg whites (from 2 eggs)
2 TSP vanilla extract
3/4 Cup non-fat milk
2 TBSP light sour cream
oh yeah, 1/2 TSP orange zest (it makes a difference!)

It's all so exciting!

It's just a few more weeks until we move into the new apartment and I really can't wait. The new place is located in a much better area, one that's actually quiet! I am looking forward to decorating it and creating many meals in my brand new kitchen! Not that the kitchen is anything to boast about, but it's one I never cooked in before! I can't wait to baptize it!

But that's not all I'm looking forward to! Jose got his LSAT results back this week and he scored in the 98th percentile!!! That deserves more than just one exclamation point, not only because it's a great score, but also because it means we'll more than likely be moving to the East Coast, where there are actually seasons! I'm looking forward to seeing the leaves change color around Autumn, and building snowmen during the winter! Oh, and did I mention they have some of the best culinary art schools on that side of the US?! Back when I was applying to college, I was hoping to submit an application to one of the art schools around the New York area. But my parents were against the idea, they didn't want me so far away, and they were afraid I might change my mind about being a designer...they were right. I ended up studying English, as you readers know...but my interest in the arts has never waned, as quite a few entries in this blog suggest. I make cards, I'm starting to make jewelry, I'm determined to learn how to use a sewing machine because I dream of the day when I can make all my own clothes, since shopping annoys me...What else? My middle finger on my right hand is crooked from all those years of writing hundreds of usually overly-dramatic, far from laureate worthy poems, and as for these days? Well, now anyone can spot me gallivanting around the kitchen with oil spots on my shirt (cheesy pun intended) either from baking a fairly edible frosted cake or an experimental concoction involving some mix of meat and vegetables that my guinea pigs would probably not eat, though my fiance ever-so-lovingly consumes with a smile on his face, followed by a quiet, closed-mouth, indigestion-produced burp disguised as a nod of approval. Well, it really isn't that bad, unless I decide to turn the kitchen into a toxic chemistry lab, but that only happens on rare occasions. That is precisely the reason why culinary art school is for me, think of how many lives will be saved !

You know, my cooking really isn't all that bad, but I like to pretend it is...just in case someone does get repulsed by something my weird taste buds find appetizing. At least if I go to culinary art school, preferably one on the East Coast, I can use it as a sort of insurance plan, or a claim to the yummy legitimacy of my kitchen creations...if Alton Brown went to the Culinary Institute of America and I did too, then obviously I can't be that bad of a cook and, really, it's just that your taste buds are uneducated! Well, maybe that doesn't sound as good as I thought it would, seeing that individual taste buds don't have brains, but you know what I mean!

(HAHA! I literally had to run off to the kitchen in the middle of this entry because I burned the potatoes and carrots that I was steaming/boiling for a pot roast I made for dinner...Note To Self: DO NOT write and cook at the same time! Two forms of expression occurring simultaneously=not good! Ah, but at least I was able to make up for it by making a mean, tasty gravy, no recipe required here, man! Oh and as for the potatoes and carrots, I was able to separate the good from the bad and discard the latter...it's my goal to never waste, but sometimes that is a challenge, my friend.)

Alright, back on topic. So, as the blog title claims...it's all so exciting! Whether I'm burning veggies in the kitchen while contemplating a blessed life as a future chef and soon-to-be wife of an LSAT genius/future attorney...or posting a new blog entry about it all, there's never a dull moment around here. Life's been tough, and even though I often thought the grass was greener on the other side, it turns out that the weedy dandelions on my side of the fence have definitely been faithful in granting wishes. Always be thankful, that's what I've learned.

Prescription Drugs: Not sweet as candy.

Just recently while watching TV, I couldn't help but notice how much air time prescription drug commercials receive. Also, have you ever noticed how long some of those commercials are? Oh, and it's kind of hard to ignore the long list of side-effects that are thrown in right before the commercial ends, usually a deep and persuasive male voice giving off an educated vibe recites them...know what I mean? You almost want to believe that all those side-effects are, in fact, rare, as the companies claim. Then you actually take the drug and start wondering if maybe, just maybe, more than 5% of people suffer from the symptoms you're experiencing because...well...you feel like crap, and this time a deeper shade than before.

The prospect of feeling better with one of these supposed "miracle drugs" is quite tempting, believe me, I know! But, just hold on, upon taking the drug, whatever it may be, you might actually start noticing a change in the way you feel...oh, but it's a change for the worse, my friend! Been there, done that. Some of the symptoms are actually more threatening or bothersome than whatever the medications are supposed to treat and alleviate. Funny, didn't mean to make reference to an aspirin pill right there; I don't have too many hard feelings against over-the counter pills...then again, even Tylenol can cause LIVER DAMAGE if your system entertains its presence for more than a few days out of the month.

Now here's the kind of story you won't hear advertised during the break right before you find out if Ditsy Dorthy is gonna continue dating that loser guy who doesn't have an ounce of redeeming qualities to his name (sorry, can't stand those dating shows)...

(Cue the violins!)
There was a time I had a gallbladder, you might've known me in those days. I actually felt far from geriatric, this was way before I took the time to notice what AARP advertisements had to offer their social security collecting customers. Ah, yes, and my gallbladder: it was lean and healthy, the perfect shade of some random Crayola color name, somewhere between Oscar the Grouch green and Big Bird Yellow. It pumped bile like no other gallbladder; my food digested fabulously...that means, no signs of bloating or nausea. Then (DUN DUN DUN!) in high school I started taking this very popular but nasty pill that contained something funky known as ESTRADIOL, aka birth control. And why did I take that pretty pink pill? Because I had ovarian cysts, and a nice cocktail combo of estrogen and progesterone was supposed to knock those suckers right out. And it did...but it also destroyed the precious life of my formerly functional gallbladder. Then I had no choice but to have it removed, or risk developing gallstones and liver damage.
That's my tragic story, but, please, read on.

I was young and naive when I first started ingesting those horrible hormones. You know that little pamphlet of informative facts that comes along with your prescription drugs? READ IT! IT'S THERE FOR A REASON. I had no idea that individuals were put at a higher risk of developing gallbladder disease if they took the pill. I was the perfect candidate for such an illness too! My mother, grandmother, and great grandmother all had to have their green little gallbladders removed.

There's a lovely saying that goes: A wise man learns from the mistakes of others, a smart man learns from his own mistakes, and a fool never learns. I'm not completely trying to destroy the credibility of every prescription drug out there. I know so many people these days that want quick relief for whatever is ailing them, but I doubt they ever stop to consider whether or not popping pills is actually wise. I understand there are certain medications whose benefits actually outweigh the costs, take inhalers prescribed to asthmatics, for instance. I am grateful for medical advancements; thank God for the existence of antibiotics that destroy common bacteria like strep. I know I certainly wouldn't be here ranting and raving if it weren't for that pink bubblegum flavored medication commonly prescribed to children with infections. Yes, Penicillin, I thank you for sparing the lives of both the young and old. But even though it might've tasted like it came out of a grocery store candy machine when it was given to me as a kiddo, Penicillin is not something meant to satisfy a sweet tooth, so we shouldn't treat it or any other prescription drug as if the worst thing they'll cause is an unpleasant visit to the dentist office followed by a few root canal appointments.